Channeling Your Inner Sandler: Ask, Don’t Tell
How to Make Discovery Feel Like Therapy (Not an Interrogation) — Halloween Edition 🎃
Tomorrow is Halloween — the one day of the year when it’s totally acceptable to walk into a meeting dressed like an alien.
And fittingly enough, that’s exactly how most reps make their buyers feel during a bad discovery call: like someone from another planet just landed, started asking questions, and immediately tried to sell them moon rocks. 🌕
So let’s fix that.
This week’s theme is all about Discovery — slowing down, getting curious, and learning to make buyers feel understood, not examined.
Because great discovery isn’t spooky — unless you count the moment you realize you’ve been monologuing for 12 straight minutes.
Why Sandler’s Discovery Method Still Works (Even in 2025)
The Sandler approach is the original anti-pitch philosophy.Forget slick scripts or “closing techniques” — Sandler teaches you to earn trust through empathy and curiosity.
It’s less “let me tell you about our cutting-edge AI-enabled workflow optimizer” and more:
“Help me understand what’s getting in your way right now.”
Because truth bomb:Your buyer doesn’t care about your rocket ship until they believe you actually understand their gravity problem.
The Horror Movie Version of Discovery
Let’s relive the nightmare for a second:
Rep: “So what CRM are you using?”
Buyer: “We’re on Salesforce.”
Rep: “Oh, perfect! We integrate with Salesforce! Let me show you—”
👻 Cue the creepy music.
You just went from friendly explorer to overeager alien trying to abduct the sale.
If your buyer’s eyes glaze over faster than a Halloween donut, it’s because you skipped the curiosity stage and jumped straight into “demo or die” mode.
Discovery That Feels Like Therapy (Not a Sci-Fi Invasion)
Good discovery is more like therapy than a cross-examination. It’s calm. It’s curious. It’s “tell me more,” not “fill out this checklist.”
When you do it right, your buyer opens up like a trick-or-treater with a full-size candy bar. 🍫
Here’s how to channel your inner Sandler without sounding like a robot from Mars:
1. Start with Emotional Safety
“Walk me through what happens when…” “What’s been the hardest part of that?” “How’s that showing up for your team?”
Tone is everything. Think curious astronaut exploring new terrain, not mad scientist poking for weakness.
2. Dig Beneath the Surface (aka Sandler’s Pain Funnel)
Each answer deserves a follow-up.
“Why do you think that’s happening?”
“How long has that been an issue?”
“What happens if it doesn’t change?”
These aren’t “sales questions.” They’re human questions. You’re not just diagnosing pain — you’re helping your buyer see it clearly.
3. Pause for Power
Silence can be your best tool. Let it sit. Let it breathe. Let your buyer keep talking. You’d be amazed what people reveal when you don’t rush to fill the space.
Confidence in the Unknown (From a Real-Life Alien 😉)
Confession time: I’m learning a new industry right now. A more technical one.
And some days, I feel like… well, an alien. 👽 So tomorrow, when my boyfriend suits up as an astronaut and I rock my alien fit, it’ll hit home — because that’s discovery.
You don’t have to know everything. You just have to stay curious, keep asking good questions, and listen like your next paycheck depends on it (because it 100% does).
When the acronyms start flying and you feel out of orbit, remember: You already know how to connect, empathize, and dig deep. That’s what makes you human — and what makes buyers trust you.
Trick-or-Treat Questions for Your Next Call
Instead of haunting your prospect with yes/no questions, try these “treats”:
🍬 “What’s one thing you wish worked better in your current setup?” 🍬
🍬 “If you could wave a magic wand, what would this process look like?” 🍬
🍬 “What happens if you don’t fix this by next quarter?” 🍬
🍬 “How does this impact your team day-to-day?” 🍬
These aren’t tricks. They’re trust-builders. They turn awkward conversations into real connections — the kind that lead to deals that stick.
The Real Monster Under the Bed
You know what’s scarier than asking tough questions? Pretending to know all the answers.
Discovery isn’t about being the smartest person in the room — it’s about being the most interested.
So take a breath. Ask another question. And if your buyer drops a curveball, don’t panic — just say:
“That’s a great question. Let’s unpack that together.”
Confidence isn’t about control. It’s about comfort in the unknown.
👽 Wrap-Up: From the Alien to the Astronauts
As I prep my little green costume for tomorrow, here’s your sales reminder:
When you show up to a discovery call, you don’t need to be the hero with all the answers.
You just need to be curious enough to explore.
You’re not there to land the ship — you’re there to map the terrain.
Ask, listen, and learn.
That’s not just sales. That’s how you turn “aliens” into allies.